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» RAILforum » Passenger Trains » Amtrak » These are not railfans

   
Author Topic: These are not railfans
travelplus
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The people who complain either do not understand how Amtrak operates or they failed to let the onboard attendant know of the problem. On one trip there was someone smoking in the bathroom and I told the onboard lead attendant who immediately resolved the problem and kicked the culprit off the train. He thanked me and had Amtrak send me a voucher and allowed me to get a free meal in the diner.

Another train a toilet was not operating properly on the Capitol Train right away the lead attendant fixed the problem and allowed me to get a meal in the cafe car on the house.

You see if passengers fail to tell about the issue when it happens and they do not allow the problem to be fixed then they start complaining about the service they get they are so demanding and the ones Amtrak wishes they would never see again.

You see when I travel on Amtrak I am nice to everyone and I am one of the most courteous passengers onboard. If I see someone litter I pick it up and throw it away no quesitons asked. I always talk with the conductor and have the ticket ready to go. I enjoy talking with people in the lounge car.

When there is a chance I have my waiter bring out the chef so that I may compliment him on his hard work. I always fill out the surveys and try to talk with the staff on board.

When there is a delay I take it in stride and let the crew know that I planned for this and to do anything within reason to get me to my destination. I am one of the few who smile and work out a deal that fits my schedule. I tell them thank you for doing such a great job and I hope the other passengers will cooperate.

I try and help passengers who are not familiar with the way Amtrak runs. I have taken them through the train and explain to them how to enjoy the trip. I answer their questions and I mention Trainweb if they have more quesitons.

I support Amtrkak 150 percent and I recommend it to many people . And I let them know the train can be delayed and let them know that Amtrak will try and work with them to the best of their ability.

Whiners stay off Amtrak Complainers who demand more than they expect or are too needy go away. You knew from the start that taking the train is slow and at a relaxed pace so why the heck are you on the train complaining. You did not speak up if the train is too hot or too cold or if your food needs to be warmer.

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travelplus
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"To put it mildly, train travel in the U.S. is off the rails. Amtrak lives from moment to moment, totally dependent on the Congressional whim of the moment. The equipment is rundown, the tracks are a mess and the train crews are, all too often, ill-trained, rude and even downright abusive"(consumeraffairs.com)

I disagree with this. Whoever wrote this is not a railfan and they are not educated on the way Amtrak runs this ain't Europe people so grow up and learn to live with the delays.

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Railroad Bob
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Thanks for posting, travelplus...I'm sure the crews you meet are also glad to have you as a passsenger. A little bit of empathy toward these workers goes a long way in getting your own problems solved and wishes answered, 'course that's true in life in general-- not just in train riding!
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Mr. Toy
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I, too, believe in letting crews know about problems, and in my observation most of them have been more than happy to fix them.

But there are some bad apples out there. From what I read here I suspect there are more of these in the eastern US than out west, but I once had a Parlour Car attendant on #11 who clearly wanted to be anywhere but where he was.

And then there are equipment failures which are beyond the crew's capabilities to fix. One common problem is Superliner toilets that randomly decide not to flush above 3,000 feet in elevation. That can make for very legitimate complaints.

Generally, though, Amtrak people do great work and are under appreciated.

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Gilbert B Norman
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It appears the same "resource" is being addressed here as at this topic:

http://www.railforum.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi/topic/11/5809.html

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royaltrain
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I think most people who book an Amtrak journey are not railfans, but simply members of the public who expect reasonably on-time service with competent and friendly on-board staff and equipment that is not in a constant state of disrepair.

If I pay $1000 to ride between L.A. and Chicago, I don't think it is unreasonable for the heat, AC and toilets in my bedroom to actually work. I should expect good food and service in the diner, and my attendant to respond when I ring the bell to put down my bed, remove my luggage etc. After all this is what I paid for and I expect reasonable value for my money. The passenger has no obligation to be nice and friendly to the crew (although I believe one should be) but the crew are being paid to serve the travelling public, and unfortunately far too often I have witnessed very substandard service that would never be tolerated in other service industries that charge prices as high as a transcontinental bedroom. Upscale hotels and the better cruise lines would never put up with the sort of things that occur far too often on Amtrak.

The "whiners and complainers" and the "needy types" find themselves on an Amtrak train that has (frequently) failed to live up to their reasonable expectations. Railfans who never complain about anything only encourage Amtrak to provide poor service.

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travelplus
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I agree with all the replies thus far.
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train lady
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whenever I have had a complaint to report I always try to add a positive comment. Something good happens along withe bad if I take tiime to look for it. The representative I talk with is always more receptive having hears something positive first.
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amtraxmaniac
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Your average patron is NOT a railfan. WE are easily pleased by virture of the fact that we are simply ON A TRAIN. The general public is not so easily satisfied. When it doesn't matter to John Q Public whether he's going by rail, car, or air, there needs to be something in the Amtrak experience that 'stands out'. There has to be an advantage to choosing Amtrak. Even as a rail fan, it's important to judge soberly. Amtrak has its issues that put it at a competitive disadvantage to other modes of transportation...and its up to AMTRAK, not its patrons to do something about it. Lets not live in fairytale land.

--------------------
Patrick

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amtrak92
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I agree with the fact that we are easily pleased with being on a train. Most people look at the train as slow, so we need to innovate and find new ways to attract people. Like bring dome cars back
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PullmanCo
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Too many trains are slow.

I have ETT of the Union Pacific from the 1960s. Eric Bowen has his PTT calculations of speed from throughout the streamliner era.

Compare the speeds of yore with the speeds now. We're going backwards, folks.

I've been hard over to the point of being pedantic on the Heartland Flyer extension thread: If the train, which is competing directly with I-35, cannot maintain a 60MPH average rate of advance, then why should a passenger use it?

It's 580 miles KC-Dallas. That's 580 minutes from two whistle blasts in KC to arrival in DFW. That's 9h 40m.

Using legal speeds during 3 seasons of the year, googlemaps runs the route in 8h 13 min. Add in 40 minute lunch break and 2 20 minute fuel breaks, and the two modes are time competitive.

Cap in trade might have worked if the cap on air transportation was an inhibiting factor, whilst the cap on rail was set as an enabling factor. Since it looks like cap is dying in Congress, it's back to basic rate of advance

I've told the story of my 2007 and 2008 trips to St Louis from KC. By the Mule, it was 6 hours. By my car, it was 4 hours. It's hard to justify half again as slow as auto.

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notelvis
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And when you're crammed 12 people into a Chevy Astra taxi van with balding tires at the St. Louis station and sent squealing across Missouri to make the connection with #3 at Kansas City, it can be done in under 3 hours and 40 minutes.....

But that's a story for another time!

--------------------
David Pressley

Advocating for passenger trains since 1973!

Climbing toward 5,000 posts like the Southwest Chief ascending Raton Pass. Cautiously, not nearly as fast as in the old days, and hoping to avoid premature reroutes.

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Tanner929
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Here's a stimulus pkg that will be an investment in the future and we all can have a stake in it.

Privatize Amtrak. The Government is a conglomerate that competes with its self. The Government builds roads, the government runs the trains. Now they own a automobile company.

The frieght lines where returned to private ownership, why not Amtrak? If the government can grab land for roads, and continue to expand highways and parkways from 4 to six lanes why can't they allow for a return to 2 or 4 track beds? I enjoy train travel but I just often do not have the time in travel. We need new ideas for improving train travel not novelle's

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PullmanCo
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Tanner...

Because the freight lines became profitable.

The last year I am aware of American railroads having profitable passenger traffic departments was 1953... Amtrak has never made a dime.

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George Harris
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"The frieght lines where returned to private ownership"

Don't know what you are talking about here. Other than the confiscation during World War One and the folding of the northeastern bankrupts into Conrail, with very few exceptions the US freight railroads never were under government ownership.

Most of the government owned lines of long standing have that I know about have long been leased to private companies for operation. Examples: North Carolina Railroad, Cincinatti Southern, Western and Atlantic. And, none of these were owned by the US government, but by states or cities.

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Hoop
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I think Amtrak could make a dime if it really wanted to.

But, as long as the Government keeps throwing money at it and everybody gets to keep their Union jobs, then there is no incentive to try to change anything and try to become profitable.

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Tanner929
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AHHHHH MEEEENNNNN mr Hoop AAAAHHHHHH MMEEEENNNN

And if you love Amtraks business plan there gonna love "The New GM (Government Motors)"

and yes i was talking about Conrail.

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amtraxmaniac
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Amtrak cannot be profittable. No national railroad is profittable. Conservatives love to use profittablity and usefullness synonomously. Passenger rail is vital but it will never make a dime. Neither should it have to to exist. Other indstrialized nations are decades, even centuries ahead of us in transportation technology, yet we squabble over keeping 50mph trains in a state of good repair. Its disgusting. Our roads are not profittable. Airlines are dependent on Uncle Sam. Yet little ole' Amtrak gets darts thrown at it at worse and table scraps scooped its way at best. Why? Special interest and lobbyist (Big Oil and the airline industry mainly) spend millions to keep transportation technology from moving into the future. There's good old fashion capitalism for you!
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smitty195
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amtraxmaniac, I know you are a Socialist (because you've said so--I'm not name calling here), so I don't want to get into a Capitalist versus Socialist discussion. However, I think you are overlooking some vital things in your comparison of the US's passenger trains to other passenger trains elsewhere in the world.

It's pretty simple when you look at it this way: If the demand were there, then the trains would be there, too. People flock to airports and airlines. People flock to their cars and the highways. People flock to regional commuter trains (BART, LIRR, NJT, Capitol Corridor, etc, etc, etc).

When you look at long-distance train travel in America (and I have taken A LOT of long-distance Amtrak trains over the last few decades), you can easily see a pattern with the passengers as you sit and chat with them. The vast majority of them are taking the train "because it's fun". They want to try something different, and many people will say things such as, "I've always wanted to try this". There are passengers who do indeed rely on Amtrak long-distance trains as their primary means of transportation, but as whole, they represent a teeny-tiny percentage of the traveling public. I like train travel, and I barely tolerate Amtrak (I have poor views of Amtrak, but I will still take them once in a blue moon). But if I have long-distance traveling to do, I take BART to SFO and hop on a plane. It's quick, modern, and extremely safe and reliable. you can't beat it. If I have local traveling to do, I have the best option for transportation that has ever been known to mankind. My transportation choice runs 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. It only stops at the locations where I want to stop. It only makes a meal stop when I am ready for food. I can listen to any music or talk radio show I want to. I don't have kids kicking the back of my seat. I don't have to put up with drunk passengers. What more could a person ask for?? It's an awesome way to travel that offers enormous flexibility. What transportation is this that I am so fond of?? Answer: My car.

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Gilbert B Norman
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Mr. Smith, William Ernest Henley (1849-1903) boldly protrayed your thoughts and mine regarding auto travel in the last stanza of hie poem, "Invictus':

I am the master of my fate, I am the captain of my soul

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palmland
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Well, Smitty, I guess the question is, what creates the demand. If you look at the NEC, there are many more trains now than on A day, and of course many more passengers. I believe the same is true in the corridors in California.

So if Amtrak had the wherewithal to create fast frequent service in other areas, would we not see the people 'flocking' to the trains. Sure, there is the question of should our society finance this - but I think your point is that trains are not a practical form of transportation, otherwise there would be more riders.

Your argument certainly has more merit if you confine it to LD trains. Most LD trains seem to me to be a rolling National Park - and should be treated as such. There is little economic or social justification except in a few remote towns.

If we do progress with multiple corridors (HSR or otherwise), then ultimately it would make sense to connect these corridors into an integrated rail system - but that's a long way off.

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amtraxmaniac
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Anyone that's seen the movie 'Field Of Dreams' knows the line "Build it and they will come". Amtrak as a national entity deserves mass capitalization. Oh well! American's don't realize that the car culture is slowly destroying our environment and perpetuating energy dependence.But the lobbyists have spoken...
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Ocala Mike
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For smitty, with apologies to Woody Guthrie:

Brrrm brm brm brm brm brm brm, brrrm b' brrrm,
Brrrm brm brm brm brm brm brrrm b' brrrm,
Brrrm brm brm brm brm brm brrrm b' brrrm.
Brrrm brm brm brm brm brm brrrm.

Take me riding in the car, car;
Take me riding in the car, car;
Take you riding in the car, car;
I'll take you riding in my car.

Click clack, open up the door, girls;
Click clack, open up the door, boys;
Front door, back door, clickety clack,
Take you riding in my car.

Climb, climb, rattle on the front seat;
Spree I spraddle on the backseat;
Turn my key, step on my starter,
Take you riding in my car.

Engine it goes boom, boom;
Engine it goes boom, boom;
Front seat, backseat, boys and girls,
Take you riding in my car.

Trees and the houses walk along;
Trees and the houses walk along;
Truck and a car and a garbage can,
Take you riding in my car.

Ships and the little boars chug along;
Ships and the little boats chug along;
Boom buhbuh boom boom boom buh boom,
Take you riding in my car.

I'm a gonna send you home again;
I'm a gonna send you home again;
Boom, boom, buhbuh boom, rolling home,
Take you riding in my car.

I'm a gonna let You blow the horn;
I'm a gonna let you blow the horn;
A oorah, a oorah, a oogah, oogah,
I'll take you riding in my car.

~ Riding in My Car by Woody Guthrie

[Razz]

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ehbowen
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An entry from my generation...with apologies to Sesame Street:

Oh I'm going for a ride
Gonna sit behind the wheel
Gonna drive along the road
Oh how happy I will feel
And I'm gonna toot my horn
Gonna travel near and far
I'm going for a ride
Going riding in a car
And a car goes vroom...
And a car goes vroom...
And a car goes vroom...
Gonna travel near and far
Going riding in a car

ETA: For the sake of completeness, I should note that there are also verses for a train, a boat, a plane....

--------------------
--------Eric H. Bowen

Stop by my website: Streamliner Schedules - Historic timetables of the great trains of the past!

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PullmanCo
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Well if you ever plan to motor west,
Just take my way , that's the highway that's the best.
Get your kicks on Route sixty-six.

Well it winds from Chicago to LA
More than two-thousand miles all the way.
Get your kicks on Route sixty-six.

Well it goes through St. Louie down to Missouri
Oklahoma City looks oh so pretty.
You'll see Amarillo, Gallup, New Mexico
Flagstaff, Arizona, don't forget Winona,
Kingsman, Barstow, San Bernardino.

Won't you get hip to this timely tip
And think you'll take that California trip.
Get your kicks on route sixty-six.
Get your kicks on route sixty-six.

*******************************************************

Well it goes through St. Louie, down to Missouri
Oklahoma city looks oh so pretty.
You'll see Amarillo, Gallup, New Mexico
Flagstaff, Arizona, don't forget Winona,
Kingsman, Barstow, San Bernardino.

Well you get hip to this timely tip
When you make that California trip.
Get your kicks on route sixty-six.
Get your kicks on route sixty-six.
Get your kicks on route sixty-six.
Get your kicks on route sixty-six.

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PullmanCo
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Do you hear that whistle down the line?
I figure that it's engine number forty-nine,
She's the only one that'll sound that way.
On the Atchison, Topeka and the Santa Fe

See the ol' smoke risin' round the bend,
I reckon that she knows she's gonna meet a friend,
Folks around these parts get the time o' day
From the Atchison, Topeka and the Santa Fe

Here she comes!
Ooh, ooh, ooh,
Hey, Jim! yuh better git the rig!
Ooh, ooh, ooh,
She's got a list o' passengers that's pretty big
And they'll all want lifts to Brown's Hotel,
'Cause lots o' them been travelin' for quite a spell,
All the way to Cal-i-forn-i-ay
On the Atchison, Topeka
On the Atchison, Topeka
on the Atchison, Topeka and the Santa Fe.

Ooh-ee!
Atchison, Topeka and the Santa Fe,
Atchison, Topeka.

Oh, the roads back east are mighty swell,
The Chesapeake, Ohio and the ASL,
But I make my run and I make my pay
On the Atchison, Topeka and the Santa Fe.

Goin' back and forth along these aisles,
My land, you must've walked about a million miles.
It's a treat to be on your feet all day
On the Atchison, Topeka and the Santa Fe.

Here we come!
Raa-a-raa-a-raa-a-raa-raa-raa
She's really rakin' down the line
Looky, look, look, looky look, look, look
Oh, boy, we're huffin' and a-puffin' on the forty-nine!

In this day and age girls don't leave home
But if you get a hankerin', you wanna roam
Our advice to you is run away
On the Atchison, Topeka and the Santa Fe.

Hey, men, did you ever see such perty femininity
arrivin' all at once in this here town?
In this here town?
Never saw the likes of this for miles around!

Round and round our heads are spinning,
New adventures are beginning.
What a length of calico,
It's taffet-ee and calico to really put a cowboy on the [word/words unknown]
Cowboy, [word/words unknown]
It's enough to make a fella wanna wash...

Wash your face and hands, we hope you'll never be afraid of soap!
Button shoes and powdered chalk and fancy smells and baby talk-
It's awful what a gal is fit to do!
Even so, we aim to say we love to honor and oh-
Baby, are there any more at home like you?

And in my hair combed and my slicker,
Gonna get spruced up and I'll [word/words unknown] her.
Put on the dog and I'll city-slick her,
Mr. Harvey, Mr. Harvey,

Fred Harvey knows exactly how to pick 'em!

We come from Dubuque, I-O-Way,
That's where the tall, tall, tall corn grows.
We come from Louisiana,
That's where the Mis-is-is-is-isippi flows.

I was the Lilian Russell of Cherryville, Kansas,
But they never gave me a chance.
I finished high school in Providence, Rhode Island,
And Providence, Rhode Island is where [word/words unknown].

(Virginia O'Brien)
Oh, I'm from Chillicothe-
Ohio!
My middle name's Hi-a-wath-ee -
Ohio!
I'm gonna git the gold in them thar hills,
So I said good-bye-o, Ohio!

We were school marms from Grand Rapids, Mich.
But reading, writing, 'rithmetic were not our dish.

(Ruth Brady)
I was born in Paris,
I was raised in Paris,
Went to school in Paris, Where I met a boy
I was married in Paris,
Almost buried in Paris,
But I finally left Paris-
Paris, Illinois!

(Ray Bolger)
So this is the wild and woolly west!
Give me my chaps and my checkered vest.
Give me a girl and a holster for my hip!
Bang, bang! Yip, yip!

--------------------
The City of Saint Louis (UP, 1967) is still my standard for passenger operations

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Judy McFarland
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Oh I'm goin' for a ride
And I'm never comin' back
Gonna be an engineer
Gonna speed along the track
Gonna hear the whistle blow
And I'm happy to explain
That I'm goin' for a ride
Goin' ridin' on a train.
And the train goes Woo-woo

etc. . .

MANY hours spent watching Sesame Street with the kids who are now 38 and 41. Ah-h-h-h my mis-spent youth!

--------------------
My new "default" station (EKH) has no baggage service or QuikTrak machine, but the parking is free! And the NY Central RR Museum is just across the tracks (but not open at Amtrak train times. . ..)

Posts: 337 | From: Goshen, IN | Registered: Jun 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Henry Kisor
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Not a song, but one could do verse:

RIDING ON A RAILROAD TRAIN

Some people like to hitch and hike;
They are fond of highway travel;
Their nostrils toil through gas and oil,
They choke on dust and gravel.
Unless they stop for the traffic cop
Their road is a fine-or-jail road,
But wise old I go rocketing by;
I'm riding on the railroad.

I love to loll like a limp rag doll
In a peripatetic salon;
To think and think of a long cool drink
And cry to the porter, allons!
Now the clickety clack of wheel on track
Grows clickety clackety clicker:
The line is clear for the engineer
And it mounts to his head like liquor.
With a farewell scream of escaping steam
The boiler bows to the Diesel;
The iron horse has run its course
And we ride a chromium weasel;
We draw our power from the harnessed shower,
The lightning without the thunder,
But a train is a train and will so remain
While the rails glide glistening under.

Oh, some like trips in luxury ships,
And some in gasoline wagons,
And others swear by the upper air
And the wings of flying dragons.
Let each make haste to indulge his taste,
Be it beer, champagne or cider;
My private joy, both man and boy,
Is being a railroad rider.

-- Ogden Nash

Posts: 2236 | From: Evanston, Ill. and Ontonagon, Mich. | Registered: Feb 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
PullmanCo
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Ridin' on the City of New Orleans
Illinois Central, Monday mornin' rail
15 cars & 15 restless riders
Three conductors, 25 sacks of mail

All along the southbound odyssey the train pulls out of Kankakee
Rolls along past houses, farms & fields
Passin' graves that have no name, freight yards full of old black men
And the graveyards of rusted automobiles

Good mornin' America, how are you?
Don't you know me? I'm your native son!
I'm the train they call the City of New Orleans
I'll be gone 500 miles when the day is done

Dealin' cards with the old men in the club car
Penny a point, ain't no one keepin' score
Pass the paper bag that holds the bottle
And feel the wheels rumblin' neath the floor

And the sons of Pullman porters & the sons of engineers
Ride their fathers' magic carpets made of steel
Mothers with their babes asleep, rockin' to the gentle beat
And the rhythm of the rails is all they feel

Good mornin' America, how are you?
Say don't you know me? I'm your native son!
I'm the train they call the City of New Orleans.
I'll be gone 500 miles when the day is done.

Night time on the City of New Orleans
Changin' cars in Memphis, Tennessee
Halfway home, we'll be there by mornin'
Thru the Mississippi darkness rollin' down to the sea

But all the towns and people seem to fade into a bad dream
And the steel rail still ain't heard the news
The conductor sings his songs again
"The passengers will please refrain:
This train got the disappea rin' railroad blues

Good night America, how are you?
Say don't you know me? I'm your native son!
I'm the train they call the City of New Orleans.
I'll be gone 500 miles when the day is done.

--------------------
The City of Saint Louis (UP, 1967) is still my standard for passenger operations

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zephyr
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Where's Ira Slotkin when you need him?
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palmland
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Gotta love Ogden Nash - thanks
Posts: 2394 | From: Camden, SC | Registered: Mar 2006  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Ocala Mike
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PullmanCo, thanks for reminding everyone about arguably the best train song ever written. Attribution, of course, to Chicago's own Steve Goodman (Chicago Shorty), a great Cubs fan, not to mention Arlo Guthrie, who made it a hit.
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RRRICH
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OK - -we can't forget Guy Clark now, can we? ("Texas 1947")?

Now bein' six years old, I had seen some trains before,
so it's hard to figure out what I'm at the depot for.

Trains are big and black and smokin' - steam screamin' at the wheels,
bigger than anything they is, at least that's the way she feels

Trains are big and black and smokin', louder'n July four,
but everybody's actin' like this might be somethin' more. . .

. . .than just pickin' up the mail, or the soldiers from the war.
This is somethin' that even old man Wileman never seen before.

And it's late afternoon on a hot Texas day.
somethin' strange is goin' on, and we's all in the way.

Well there's fifty or sixty people they're just sittin' on their cars,
and the old men left their dominos and they come down from the bars.

Everybody's checkin', old Jack Kittrel check his watch,
and us kids put our ears to the rails to hear 'em pop.

So we already knowed it, when they finally said 'train time'
you'd a-thought that Jesus Christ his-self was rollin' down the line.

'Cause things got real quiet, momma jerked me back,
But not before I'd got the chance to lay a nickel on the track.

Chorus
Look out here she comes, she's comin',
Look out there she goes, she's gone,
screamin' straight through Texas
like a mad dog cyclone.

Big, red, and silver,
she don't make no smoke,
she's a fast-rollin' streamline
come to show the folks.

Look out here she comes, she's comin'
Look out there she goes, she's gone,
screamin' straight through Texas
like a mad dog cyclone.

. . .Lord, she never even stopped.

She left fifty or sixty people still sittin' on their cars,
and they're wonderin' what it's comin' to
and how it got this far.

Oh but me I got a nickel smashed flatter than a dime
by a mad dog, runaway red-silver streamline. . . train

Posts: 2427 | From: Grayling, MI | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Henry Kisor
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Boy, have we turned this thread's subject line upon its head!
Posts: 2236 | From: Evanston, Ill. and Ontonagon, Mich. | Registered: Feb 2007  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
David
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quote:
Originally posted by palmland:
Gotta love Ogden Nash - thanks

My favourite Ogden Nash poem is "The Unwinged Ones."

I don’t travel on planes
I travel on trains.
Once in a while, on trains,
I see people who travel on planes.
Every once in a while I’m surrounded
By people whose planes have been grounded.
I’m enthralled by their air-minded snobbery,
Their exclusive hobnobbery,
And I’ll swear to, before any notary,
The clichés of their coterie.
They feel that they have to explain
How they happen to be on a train,
For even in Drawing Room A
They seem to feel déclassé.
So they sit with portentous faces
Clutching their attaché cases.
As the Scotches they rapidly drain
That they couldn’t have got on the plane,
They grumble and fume about how
They’d have been in Miami by now.
They frowningly glance at their watches,
And order more Scotches.
By the time they’re passing through Rahway,
They should be in Havana or Norway,
And they strongly imply that perhaps,
Since they’re late, the world will collapse.
Then, as station merges with station,
They complain of the noise and vibration,
These outcasts of aviation,
They complain of the noise and vibration.
Sometimes on the train I’m surrounded
By people whose planes have been grounded.
That’s the only trouble with trains;
When it fogs, when it smogs, when it rains,
You get people from planes.

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RRRICH
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Hmmm --- we could use an Ira Slotkin limerick about now..........
Posts: 2427 | From: Grayling, MI | Registered: Mar 2002  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
Tanner929
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From the Great Gordon Lightfoot

Early Mornin' Rain

In the early morning rain
With a dollar in my hand
With an achin' in my heart
And my pockets full of sand
I'm a long way from home
And I miss my loved ones so
In the early morning rain
With no place to go

Out on runway number nine
Big seven-o-seven set to go
But I'm stuck here in the grass
Where the cold wind blows
Now the liquor tasted good
And the women all were fast
Well there she goes my friend
Well she's rollin' down at last

Hear the mighty engines roar
See the silver bird on high
She's away and westward bound
Far above the clouds she'll fly
Where the mornin' rain don't fall
And the sun always shines
She'll be flyin' o'er my home
In about three hours time

This old airport's got me down
It's no earthly good to me
'Cause I'm stuck here on the ground
As cold and drunk as I cab be
You can't jump a jet plane
Like you can a freight train
So I'd best be on my way
In the early morning rain
You can't jump a jet plane
Like you can a freight train
So I'd best be on my way
In the early morning rain

Posts: 516 | From: New Haven, CT USA | Registered: Feb 2005  |  IP: Logged | Report this post to a Moderator
   

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